So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
