her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
