So drunk its hurt
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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