it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
its liver damage thursday
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize