Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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