i would punch a child for taco bell
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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