I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
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