And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
