Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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