so explain again why im purple
no
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
We are two peas in an std pod
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
