It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
