You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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