She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
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I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
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we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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