after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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