if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
