When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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