i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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