last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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