you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Randomize
