i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
