No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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