I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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