No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
