I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize