you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
