I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Damn victory sex feels great
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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