Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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