Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
