I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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