have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
