Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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