On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
