Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
You can't special order awesome
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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