So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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