I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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