it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
