look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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