Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
