Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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