Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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