New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
