Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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