So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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