Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
