Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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