No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
