I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
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I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
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The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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