Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.

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(630): She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend. http://tfl.nu/zf6u

Replies (14) Good night (5259) Bad night (996)
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(302): View more from Delaware

I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.

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(302): I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that. http://tfl.nu/9h2q

Replies (11) Good night (5613) Bad night (1096)
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(626): View more from California

he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??

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(626): he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that?? http://tfl.nu/9sps

Replies (26) Good night (1519) Bad night (5953)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...

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(908): Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty... http://tfl.nu/7ob9

Replies (13) Good night (2787) Bad night (1263)
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(904): View more from Florida

she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...

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(904): she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room... http://tfl.nu/wehm

Replies (8) Good night (3217) Bad night (1200)
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(507): View more from Minnesota

Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party

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(507): Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party http://tfl.nu/rmdq

Replies (3) Good night (986) Bad night (2248)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.

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(405): Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved. http://tfl.nu/fkxo

Replies (4) Good night (1360) Bad night (763)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.

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(774): Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist. http://tfl.nu/bzfc

Replies (9) Good night (3915) Bad night (1344)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"

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(860): I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is" http://tfl.nu/o552

Replies (1) Good night (1482) Bad night (691)
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(906): View more from Michigan

Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.

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(906): Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work. http://tfl.nu/815e

Replies (13) Good night (1111) Bad night (2915)
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(713): View more from Texas

I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"

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(713): I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in" http://tfl.nu/49tf

Replies (7) Good night (793) Bad night (499)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man

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(864): Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man http://tfl.nu/sja1

Replies (4) Good night (794) Bad night (316)
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(580): View more from Oklahoma

Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.

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(580): Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA. http://tfl.nu/0dmc

Replies (3) Good night (995) Bad night (298)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I think you just miss his friendship.

(1-404): View more from Georgia

I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.

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(404): I think you just miss his friendship. (1-404): I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms. http://tfl.nu/chz3

Replies (1) Good night (1001) Bad night (250)
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(760): View more from California

Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.

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(760): Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick. http://tfl.nu/b7j5

Replies (1) Good night (736) Bad night (220)

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