Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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