i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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