im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize