Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
